


trade this life for something new

by shecouldbeamazing



Series: doctor who drabbles [1]
Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Gen, New Doctor, Regeneration, Twelfth Doctor - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-06-05
Updated: 2013-06-05
Packaged: 2017-12-13 22:29:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/829600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shecouldbeamazing/pseuds/shecouldbeamazing
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s finally happening.  His death.  It’d been a long time coming. 300 years in the same body. Hadn’t done that in a while.  But now it was time. Time to start over.</p>
            </blockquote>





	trade this life for something new

**Author's Note:**

> Just something I wrote down after thinking too long about the doctor regenerating.

It was finally happening.  His death.  It’d been a long time coming. 300 years in the same body. Hadn’t done that in a while.  But now it was time. Time to start over. 

Stepping away from Clara and her tear filled eyes, he winked, knowing all the while that he had to be strong for her.  This time he welcomed death. All those years ago he was afraid of losing who he was and all those people he’d come to love. But this go round, he had lost so much, done so much, and said so little- he wanted to die. He wanted to forget. The pain would be more bearable. Seeing through the eyes of another man would ease the anguish he had dealt with for so many centuries.

His ponds were gone.  

His wife was dead.  

At least he got to see Rose one last time.  

And his secret was safe.  

And Clara.  Clara was still here with him to the very end, with someone he thought he’d never see again.  

“River- what’s happening?” Clara cried out as the Doctor’s hands started to glow. River merely pulled her away from the sight, making eye contact with the Doctor from afar. 

 “He’s regenerating.” 

"He’s dying.”

 “Yes. He is. But he’s a time lord. And time lords have a way of cheating death.”  

“I’ll become someone else. Regenerate a whole new body. New personality. Almost like putting on a new suit. Except not really like that at all.” 

 Clara gripped River’s hand tightly.  “But you can’t. You can’t die now. We’ve only just met…What if the new you isn’t the same?”  

The Doctor grimaced, a tear rolling down his cheek. “I’m always me, Clara…Now stand back.”  River made sure Clara was a safe distance away before making her way over to her husband.  This was it.  The final page.  He’d closed his eyes, but felt her hand slip in his. In shock, he shook his head. 

“River. No. What are you doing?” 

She smiled through her tears and he thought she was as radiant as ever and his hearts seized in his chest. After all those years alone, the universe had brought his wife back to him. One last goodbye.  It was only until she spoke that his world got that much brighter.  

“Hello sweetie.”  And she kissed him. 

 There was a burst of light, a whisper of love, and then he was gone.

 

* * *

 

He opened his eyes and found he was on the ground. 12 times regenerating and you’d think he’d get used to it.  Clara was in the corner of the console room, eyes wide and River was at her side.  He couldn’t look that bad could he? He felt different. Like a heavy load had been lifted off his shoulders. The bow tie felt wrong on him and the tweed felt itchy. Shrugging off the jacket, he stepped towards Clara and River, eyes on Clara reassuringly.  

She was visibly shaken, but her lips were pursed as she took him in, trying to see if she could find her doctor somewhere in those new eyes.  She poked him, scared, and River gave a laugh.  “Oh really. Do I look that bad?”

 “You look amazing,” River murmured, giving him an endearing smile. He grinned right back, but held up a hand.

“Hush, wife. I want Clara’s opinion. She’s less biased.”  River raised an eyebrow as he grinned cheekily, but let Clara speak.  

“Amazing isn’t how I’d put it, exactly.” said Clara truthfully. 

“Oh? Then how would you put it?” 

“I don’t know. It’s just- you’re so different.” 

"I’m still me, Clara,” he said, taking her hand. “And you’re still my impossible girl.”  Clara nodded, eyes welling up.

“I suppose I was so used to the dark look, the big chin, and the floppy hair. Now you’re all- ...orangey.”  

His hearts stopped.   

Staring at River, he gulped.  “...No.” 

 “Doctor?”  His face lit up and oh did it feel like Christmas now.   

“Am I really?!?! Oh, this is cool! Oh- no that doesn’t sound right at all. This is fantastic! No. Brilliant! Ehh. Excellent? Ah yes! That’s the one. This is excellent! Absolutely excellent!"   

“Have I broken him?” Clara whispered to River. River just stared at her husband in amusement.  

“Don’t worry. He’ll calm down eventually.”

 The two heard a shout of delight from the other side of the room. The Doctor held up a mirror and pointed at its reflection.  “I’m ginger! Clara look! I’M GINGER!!”

 


End file.
